This last week has been hard in the NBICU. We lost 3 patients. This part of our job never gets any easier. Andrew, Rio and Amaris may be gone but they will never be forgotten by their families or by us. Their families will never be forgotten. The babies go to join Jax, Gabriel. Aaron, Bridget, and unfortunately many others.
This week I was taken by surprise when one of the families came back and gave me (and everyone who had taken care of Rio) the following story.
A wise man was accustomed to taking walks on the beach every morning, thinking of ways to change the world. One morning, he passed a boy methodically picking up starfish off the beach and throwing them into the water. He asked the boy, "Why are you doing this?" The boy replied without looking up, "It's low tide," he said, "and all these starfish on the beach will die out here in the sun." The mans smiled. "But son, this beach stretches on for miles and miles and there are thousands of starfish. Do you really think you are making a difference?" The boy grabbed a star fish, gently tossed it back into the water and then looked up at the man. "I made a difference to that one."
They finsihed the story with saying this was their way of saying thank you for making a difference in their lives and the life of Rio.
This really touched me in a way that I can't really explain. Often when having to help families say goodbye to their babies I feel a sense of failure. I often feel like I let these families down. There unfortuneately is not always things that can be done. We try our best and sometimes it is not enough. Instead of feeling like I let them down, this family reminded me that for whatever time they had him I and other members of the NICU team had made a positive impact on their lives.
So the lesson reinforced to many of us this week, is to take time to hug and love those close to you, because death can be sudden and unexpected.
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